The way we were -- the way things were

(Reflections on the Korea Fan Meeting in Seoul on 2009.7.19)

I was listening to Barbra Streisand singing "The way we were" --

Could it be that it was all so simple then?
Or has time re-written every line?
If we had the chance to do it all again
Tell me: Would we? Could we?
Memories.........

when it all came back in a flash -- memories of the Korea Fan Meeting in Seoul on July 19, 2008.

I have never written about this event because there are some things I would rather forget. Still, it represents a first for me -- the first time I slept in the same bed with a stranger! Because hotels were full, I had to share a room (which had only one bed) with Greencup whom I've only seen once in Japan. Neither of us slept a wink that night. Only for Jo Hyun-Jae!

The next night we changed hotels and the situation was much improved. I spent two nights in a big room with Apple, Piggie, and Greencup. I am the only daughter in my family and I've always had my own room. So this was like a dorm, quite fun in a way. Apple is the smartest and kindest JHJ fan I know: takes care of everyone and everything in a cheerful way, a genius at multi-tasking; Piggie the sweetest (in a dreamy sort of way) and most devoted: she spends every waking moment on JHJ, as least during those three days; and Greencup the most generous: she travels with an extra suitcase full of presents, for Hyun-Jae and other fans.

If you're reading this, you must have seen all the video clips and photos of the Korea Fan Meeting. So I'll just mention the superlatives here (which represent my thoughts and feelings.)

The WORST PART was of course the waiting for seats to be allotted before the show. We stood from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m., in the rain and the heat, in the confusion and lack of order. Actually seat allotment was supposed to begin at 11:30 a.m. Why were we there at 10 a.m.? We thought we could help out but we were not needed. I have never felt so bad in my life: my legs were killing me (good thing I was wearing flats, the others were in high heels) and I was so parched! If it had not been for JHJ, I would not have suffered the utter chaos.

The MOST SURPRISING thing was the main hall at Yonsei University (the setting for parts of "Love Letter", very beautiful campus) was not full! The upper balcony was not used at all. Even in the main auditorium downstairs, there were empty seats. Only about 500 people attended. Apparently the event was not advertised, so it was just an inner circle thing among diehard fans. However, what was lacking in number was more than made up for in enthusiasm and fervour. The fans here were no less ardent than those at the Japan Fan Meetings.

The MOST BORING part was at the beginning when the MC talked for half an hour. I was told he was a famous comic actor. He was tall and broad and he came out wearing sunglasses (no wonder, because without them he looked ordinary.) He addressed himself only to the Korean fans who were seated to the right (I was on the extreme left), and of course only they could understand him. I wish he'd realized this was not his show.

I was half asleep by the time Hyun-Jae finally appeared, not being able to sleep the night before. JHJ's presence of course perked me up, and his singing was much improved. The MOST UNFORTUNATE thing was: my seat was to the extreme left, so when Hyun-Jae sat down to talk with the MC, all I could see was the right side of his face and sometimes just the back of his head. (I could see every unattractive feature of the MC who's directly facing me.) I could not even see the big screen because obstructed (again I could only see the MC, not JHJ.) I almost dozed off because couldn't see, couldn't understand, too tired and sleepy.

The part that aroused the GREATEST ANTICIPATION was Hyun-Jae selecting the fans' presents that were placed on the right side of the stage (farthest from me.) The first one he picked was given by some Hong Kong fans who sat just in front of me. They were overjoyed! It wasn't until I saw it on the computer afterwards that I realized what it was: it's little cups of pudding in a doggie container that can be used as a piggie bank. I bought the same thing at Hong Kong International Airport for a 5-year-old girl (daughter of a friend of ours) when I returned to Beijing last time. The second present Hyun-Jae picked was again from Hong Kong, a beautifully handcrafted "Lucky Swan" made by a fan called Puiwa. Hyun-Jae looked at the Lucky Swan with great appreciation and wonder. The third present (JHJ only picked three) was also handmade, and depicted a soldier figure against some country background.

The MOST MOVING moment was of course when Hyun-Jae was overcome with emotion during the singing of the third song. I could see the tears well up in his eyes (I was using a pair of binoculars.) He put his hand up to his mouth but could not go on, so he turned his back to the audience (twice!) He managed to finish the song, though. It's moments like this that you want to hug him, to tell him that everything will be fine. I think he was not only overwhelmed by the ardour of the fans; he must have been thinking about the future too -- the uncertainty, the unpredictability, the not-knowing, the inability to control one's fate. What will the future hold? Who knows how many fans will still be waiting for him when he comes out of the army in two years' time? Fans are fickle, and handsome young actors emerge on the Korean entertainment scene every day.

The MOST AMUSING part was Hyun-Jae playing games with his Korean fans. They were asked questions of his dramas and JHJ and the fan were each supposed to answer RIGHT (dot) or WRONG (cross) by putting up the respective sign. The fans got it all right (they must all be familiar with JHJ's works) but Hyun-Jae sometimes got it wrong (somehow) and he "cheated" by turning the sign around. That was funny! Once he gave the wrong answer but argued his point of view, and everybody laughed, even though I didn't understand what he said. And once he held the sign in such a way that it's neither RIGHT nor WRONG, and when challenged, he explained his action to great laughter and applause. It's good to see Hyun-Jae developing into a confident person who has a mind of his own.

Hyun-jae was MOST RELAXED when he played games with the three Japanese fans. That's the one when they hit each other on the head with the plastic hammers if they're caught in the wrong action. He obviously has special feelings for his Japanese fans who are so loyal to him. There were 130+ Japanese fans there. Most of them have attended his fan meetings in Osaka and Tokyo as well as the Nagoya dinner show, and now they have come to Seoul to support him . Many of them later went to see him off in Seoul on August 5.

Hyun-Jae sang 4 songs altogether (only 2 in Osaka and Tokyo). I remember wishing then that he would release a CD (and now he has.) He's getting better and better as a singer. If he could sing like that on stage, in the recording studio the effect would come out at least 300% better. During his second song, he forgot some lyrics and smiled in embarrassment -- he's so cute!

At the close of the fan meeting, everybody got to shake Hyun-Jae's hand, ( just like at Osaka and Tokyo), but there was no photo-taking. God! He looked so drop-dead gorgeous up close! And I could get used to shaking his hand (for the third time now.)

That night we attended the EVER party. There were over a hundred people, with overseas fans from Japan, China, and Thailand joining the Korean fans. It was good to see so many devoted fans of JHJ, all communicating without speaking a common language (the Koreans and Japanese have very limited English) and sharing information and memories about our idol. They were all nice people, unpretentious and easy-going, single-minded in their love of JHJ. I felt like I was a member of a big happy family. They showed MVs of JHJ and video clips from his various dramas, and the girls were screaming, like in a pop concert. It was an evening of comaraderie and fun.

If I had the chance to do it all again, would I? You bet!