A Different Corner -- It happened one night.....

(This is Christine's story)

It all started one night last winter. It was an ordinary night. As usual, after the shower I settled down comfortably on the sofa and switched on the TV while smearing hand cream on my hands and feet. Both my kids were sound asleep as the clock showed 01:00am after midnight. It was the most relaxing time for me after a busy day.

As a mother of two young kids, I am always busy taking care of them. Because of them, I have quit many of my hobbies, one of which was watching TV series. I now watch only news channel, Discovery channel and HBO movie channel. Occasionally I would take a glance at some TV series played by well-known idols after both my kids have gone to bed. But never have I gone through all those dramas, let alone been anyone’s fan.

That night I happened to switch to an idol drama channel. On the screen was a skinny little boy running down the street with a big basket in his hands. I couldn’t tell what really touched me, maybe the music that made the whole atmosphere a little bit sad, maybe the expression on the boy’s face, or maybe the story of a rope coming down from God for the rescue; I only know I forgot it was very late and couldn’t stop watching it.

Then the little boy grew up. On the clean white snow, I saw a pretty young face with the brightest smile just like the early morning sunshine. It was the purest smile I have ever seen. I couldn’t remove my eyes from this clean shining face. Then I heard his voice, which was the kind that I like: soft, tender and magnetic. (Luckily I was watching the original Korean soundtrack with Chinese caption.) My eyes followed him, greedily watching him walking, talking, laughing and praying. To me he was like the incarnation of an angel. Even the faint grieved expression on his face when he was playing the harmonica resembled the sorrow of an angel.

From that day on, I stayed up late every night just to wait for him. I experienced all the happiness and sadness with him. Never has an actor touched me so much the way he did. Because the original edition only showed the Korean name of the actors, I went to the internet and typed in “Love Letter” to find out his name. Then I knew he is Jo Hyun-Jae.

In order to know more about him, I went to some of his fan sites such as JHJChina, JHJTaiwan and JHJHK whenever I had time. I didn’t register at any of these sites at first because I didn’t want to be anyone’s fan on an impulse. Luckily these sites are all very friendly to the visitors and generously share the information with everyone.

I spent almost two months skimming through every post on those sites. I dipped into his works, his pictures, his interviews and his messages left for his fans. I also read many beautiful articles written by his fans expressing their love for him. He didn’t disappoint me. I found besides his gorgeous looks and sexy appearance, his placid personality, his mild manners and his dedication to acting deeply attracted me. He is such a gentle, modest and noble person that made me just want to dote on him as if he is my dear little brother. Meanwhile I found myself developing an infatuation for him as if he is my dream lover.

Still I didn’t register. At my age, I was a little bit ashamed to fall for somebody who is much younger than me. Also I felt guilty towards my husband since I have always been a faithful wife who has never even thought about any other man for so many years. I thought it was better to hide my feelings for him deep in my heart. I thought I could do it!

But I couldn’t!!! The deeper I hid my feelings, the stronger they grew. I couldn’t resist my yearning desire of watching him and reading about him everyday. I wanted to let him know that he’s not alone. I wanted to do something practical to support him. So I made up my mind. I registered at his fan sites, and almost at the same time, I became a member of his fan club in China.

Now I can speak out loudly that I love him and don’t feel guilty because this love is not the kind of love between man and woman. It is more than that. It is the kind of love that is unselfish, unjealous and doesn’t need to be requited. It inspires me, improves me and reminds me of the beauty of life. I really thank Mr. Jo Hyun-Jae for making me realize how we should love each other and give much more love to the people around us.

I remember there are some words written on one of Mr. Jo Hyun-Jae’s pictures which say: "There are two ways of spreading light---to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it". If he is the candle (actually he is the sunlight to me ), I will be glad to be the mirror that reflects him and makes him more and more shining.